Share Your Story: Favorite Pre-adoption Books
We asked our reader panel to describe the books they find most helpful to prospective adoptive parents. Here are some of their favorites.March/April 2005
Adopting on Your Own
by Lee Varon
This book bridged a gap for me, as I went from thinking of single
parenthood as a somehow "lesser" option to seeing it as something I
wanted to do. After several readings, Varon seemed like a friend, and
the process of completing the paperwork and homestudy seemed almost
natural (although I did take a day off from work to clean my
Toddler Adoption: The Weaver's
by Mary Hopkins-Best
This book played a big part in our preparation to adopt two toddlers.
Parts of it were difficult to read, but I feel that it prepared us for
the worst-case scenarios we might have encountered. Luckily, though,
none of our experiences have been as bad as those described in this
book. I recommend this book to anyone considering adopting a child
over 12 months.
The Complete Idiot's Guide to
by Christine Adamec
Our daughter, Jenna, got a respiratory infection soon after her
adoption, but our health insurance carrier denied the claim, stating
that hers was a pre-existing condition. I had read about the Omnibus
Budget Reconciliation Act of 1993, which stipulates that your child is
covered from the minute you take possession of her on foreign soil, as
well as that there are no pre-existing conditions for adopted
children, in The Idiot's Guide. I sent a copy of the relevant
page to our carrier, and a couple of days later, I got a call: All of
Jenna's medical bills would be covered. For essential adoption-related
information, you can't beat this book.
by Nelson Handel
This book is much more than a how-to guide for drafting the Dear
Birthmother letterit also provides insight and comfort for those
going through the adoption process. As an adoption attorney, I offer
Reaching Out to all of my clients.
In Their Own Voices
by Rita James Simon and Rhonda M. Roorda
I'm the mother of two transracially adopted children, Gabriella, 3,
who's Hispanic, and Dante, 3 months, who's African-American. This book
has given me a lot of ideas for how to give my children a sense of
self and race, and to help them deal with racism.
Seeds of Love
by Mary Ebejer Petertyl and Jill Chambers
Before traveling to Belarus to adopt our daughter, Lexi, we read this
book over and over again to our 4-year-old biological son, Matthew.
Then we gave him seeds to water while he stayed at Grandma and
Grandpa's house. He did very well while we were gone, and was
extremely proud to show his new 18-month-old sister his "seeds of
love" when we brought her home.
Love in the Driest Season
by Neely Tucker
While adopting from Russia, I read any book about international
adoption I could get my hands on. This memoir, which chronicles one
couple's effort to adopt a Zimbabwean baby, was incredibly inspiring.
And it made me realize that, no matter what corner of the world you
live in or adopt from, there will always be a homestudy, a mountain of
paperwork, and government officials to contend with!
Adopting After Infertility
by Patricia Irwin Johnson
A friend gave me this book after I miscarried in June 2000. I was
instructed to read the first three chapters, which deal with
infertility, but I kept reading. Then I asked my husband one night,
"How do you feel about adoption?" His answer: "Relieved!" By December
we were the parents of a gorgeous baby boy born in South Korea. We
adopted another perfect son in December 2001. Who knew that reading
one book could be so instrumental in the creation of our
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