Though we never heard back from our son’s birth mother, I continued to write, bragging with a motherly pride I thought only she could understand.
Other Brothers (and Sisters!)
Six families share their amazing stories about the power of birth sibling connections.
“Knowing Our Son’s Birth Father”
It has been hard to watch Kenneth struggle as a birth dad in an open adoption. I wish my husband and I could make it easier for him, and for our son.
“Introducing Tessa to Her Birth Father”
After seven years, we decided to bring our daughter’s birth father back into her life. But was she ready for him?
“Why Don’t We Ever Visit My Birth Parents?”
After three domestic adoptions, we have three very different levels of openness with each of our children’s birth families.
Birth Parent Relationship Changes in the Teen Years
“We have a semi-open relationship with our 14-year-old son’s birth mother. Recently, he asked if we could invite her for a weekend. I trust his birth mom, but I’m worried.”
“We Did Not ‘Save’ Our Son”
Saying Matthew was “saved” implies doubt about his desirability, his worthiness to be adopted. “After all, you didn’t have to take in this baby,” is the unspoken message.
“When the Babysitter is…the Birth Mom!”
Though I’m indisputably my daughter’s mom, the time she spends with her birth mother seems to offer something I can’t.
“A Dollhouse Family Just Like Ours”
Buying a dollhouse for my daughter’s third birthday was a cinch. Finding the right family to live in it was a bit more difficult.
“Mourning His Birth Mother with the Birth Family”
The tragic loss of our son’s birth mother was followed by a powerful new connection with his birth family.
“Intimate Strangers”: Birth Parent Contact in Foster Adoption
The 894 pages of my daughter’s foster care case history described her birth mother’s hard life, scarred by poverty, drug addiction, and homelessness. I never expected to meet her—much less like her.
“A Homeland Trip with My Teens”
I planned our homeland trip, hoping to see my children’s birthplaces. Surprisingly, those proved elusive, but we found meaning at every turn.
Feeling Guilt Over the Birth Mom’s Grief
“Many parents feel guilty because their joy is the direct result of a difficult decision by the birth mother — someone you may have grown to care about. So when a new adoptive mother sees the birth mother in intense pain, she asks herself, ‘Was adoption really the right thing to do?'”
“Babies and Birth Moms and Bellies, Oh My!”
When our two children began to ask questions — lots of questions — my partner and I found answers in homemade adoption storybooks.
A Mother by Any Other Name
Is the term ‘birth mother’ an example of appropriate, positive language — or an offensive and demeaning label?
Helping Family Understand Open Adoption
Your family — especially older relatives — may not get why you are choosing an open adoption. Adoption expert Kathleen Silber gives advice on what to say.
Open Adoption Over the Years
Parents involved in open adoptions speak honestly about working through challenges and keeping the relationship going through life changes.
“I Have a Birth Mom, Too” – How Children Can Explain Open Adoption to Friends
Answers to your parenting questions.
Breaking Bad News: “I Have Something to Tell You”
How do you break bad news about job loss, illness, or divorce to the birth parents in an open adoption relationship?
Not Open Adoption, Just Adoption
Practices once confined to open adoption are quickly becoming the norm. When will the language catch up?