“Our adoption profile was shown to an expectant mother, and she selected a different family. We knew this was a possibility, of course, but feel disappointed. How to cope?” Readers offer advice.
Adoption Referrals & Expectant Mother Matches
Receiving an international adoption referral or matching with an expectant mother is an exciting step on your adoption process. Learn what to expect in a referral, and how to navigate the match period, in the expert articles and personal stories below.
"Be yourself" and more real-life advice for the "match meeting" with an expectant mother.
“We are adopting from foster care and have an ‘ice breaker’ meeting with a 10-year-old boy scheduled for tomorrow. I’m super nervous. Can anyone share advice about forging a connection?”
We asked, did you get "the call" that you'd been selected by a birth mother after the baby was already born? Parents respond with their experiences and been-there advice.
From newborns to teens to sibling groups, adoptive parents share the thought process behind their age preferences when adopting.
“Looking back on this picture, I see a child who was confused, but yearning for what we all want and need: security, a family, and love. The picture is about hope.”
We may not have heard our children’s very first words, but we’ve heard many others in our journey through infertility and foster adoption—and now, as family.
We asked our readers: Tell us about the first time you saw your child. Was in the hospital or in a referral photo?
We asked our readers what advice they would give to a hopeful adoptive parent who just had an adoption situation fall through. Read the answers.
It's the moment you'll never forget. Here adoptive parents share the story of the most desired of all adoption situations, that all-important phone call...
Sometimes, you go somewhere expecting it to be totally different, and it ends up seeming familiar. I had that feeling as I led a group of students on a trip to China—and then again, back home, as we met an expectant mother.
We asked our readers: should adopting parents be allowed to choose gender? This is what real parents shared about their decisions.
Matched out of the blue with an expectant mother, we were told the next call might come within days. But as the wait stretched to weeks and then months, I despaired—would our dreams ever come true?
Have you ever been at a baby shower where they play a home video of the mother-to-be surprising her partner with news of her pregnancy? As we grappled with infertility, my wife and I hated those videos, even as we desperately hoped for one of our own.
The big day is finally here. Referral or hospital address in hand, you're ready to meet your child. But before you board that plane, learn from our experts (read: adoptive parents) how to make your adoption trip the journey of a lifetime.
For prospective adoptive parents hoping to meet an expectant mother, few situations are more anxiety-inducing than their first encounter. Whether you plan to meet in person or over the phone, knowing ahead of time what questions to ask-and not ask-can reduce your anxiety and help you make the most of this opportunity to obtain information.
Keep in mind that your goal is to connect with the right expectant mother for you. Successful adoptions occur when prospective adoptive parents and birth parents make a strong pre-birth connection. So, resist making yourself into something you’re not.
I may not remember when I first knew I wanted to be a mother, but the moments leading up to and the first time I saw my daughters are indelibly etched in my memory.
After struggling to parent my twin daughters for ten months, I sadly realized I couldn’t provide them with the stable life I’d envisioned.
We asked our readers: Do you believe your child was destined for your family? Or does fate have nothing to do with it? Here are your stories.