As I prepared to adopt my second child, I welcomed the home study worker into a perfectly clean and ordered home. The scene that greeted her at her post-placement visit was, well, different—but much more real.
The Post-Adoption Adjustment for New Siblings, First-Time Parents, and More
Adoption brings changes to any family. Experts and parents offer advice on helping siblings adjust, getting used to parenthood, and more.
Six months after she came home to us, our daughter stopped speaking. As I searched for clues as to her sudden silence, I became profoundly grateful to her Chinese foster father, a man I had never met, for teaching me a valuable lesson about selfless love.
Adoption allowed me to fulfill my dream of finally becoming a mother, and my flexible work schedule allows me to be the mom I’ve always wanted to be. Here’s how you can make it work, too.
“We are preparing for our first overnight visit with sisters we hope to adopt from foster care, and are nervous. What are we supposed to do for 24 hours with two children who are essentially strangers?”
“Our son had been excited about the idea of a ‘little brother,’ but, from the day our younger son came home, they have had intense rivalry; there was no ‘honeymoon’ period. What can we do?”
We asked our readers how they introduced the idea of a second child to their first. Here’s what they shared for each age group.
Adoptees and their families need help and guidance throughout their lives. Support groups can help provide that.
Preparing your child for a new sibling can be a challenge at any age, but especially when she is a sensitive teen.
A parent-to-be who’s adopting a four-year-old from foster care solicits advice about what to do that first day home and how to make it easier on the child.
My partner and I thought long and hard about whether we wanted to adopt a second child. We decided to adopt a puppy-sister for our daughter instead.
“My husband and I are working to adopt from foster care. How do we transition a child from calling us our first names to calling us ‘Mom’ and ‘Dad’?”
After finally realizing my dream of becoming a mother, I found what most new parents find—along with the bliss come days filled with crying, spit-up, and leaking diapers. But when I dared to vent, I was chided: “You wanted to adopt…you asked for this!”
Sometimes love comes easy. Other times, it must be earned. This is the story of how I let go of my preconceived ideas about bonding and motherhood and became brave enough to trust my heart.
“We adopted our 10-year-old daughter as an infant, and adopted her seven- and eight-year-old biological sisters last month. How can we help all three girls bond with each other?”
When I was a teen, my parents decided to grow our family by adopting from foster care. How did it feel to suddenly gain four new brothers and sisters through adoption?
Adoptive parents and adoptees share their favorite adoption memories from the past year, including first Mother’s Days, finalizing adoptions, and gaining access to open records.
A single mother who’s adopting a boy from foster care seeks advice on a challenging older child adoption adjustment. Parents who have adopted older children respond.
A parent solicits opinions about a day care that encourages the children to call the employees “Auntie” and the other children “brothers and sisters.”
For eight years, my wife and I watched our chances of having a baby evaporate. Then our eleven-year-old niece came to live with us, bringing with her a bittersweet deliverance.
“I began to understand what Bianca was going through. She wasn’t sure she was ready for a baby sister yet. Was I?”