Living with Openness

in a family that's built through open adoption and step-relatives, more love is more love

“More Love Is More Love”

“More Love Is More Love”

In many families, relationships come without exact names. While adoption highlighted this truth, it was already a given in my family—and maybe in yours, too?

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“Family Is Now” - Open Adoption and Changing Relationships

“Family Is Now”

What if my daughter doesn't choose me? What if she grows up and moves to live near her other mom—her birth mom? I think about that and I get scared. Then I think, so what if she does? I can’t worry about that; I can only parent now.

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"We Are All Adopted," by Veronica Chenik Gilmore

“We Are All Adopted”

From my own search for my roots through adopting older children from foster care, life has taught me to treasure my children’s biological connections while knowing that we don’t have to look alike to belong together.

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a birth mother attends her son's second birthday party and finds she feels accepted by his family

“Finding My Place in the Family”

Though society doesn’t know what to do with birth mothers, I knew I had a place with my son’s parents. At his second birthday party, I learned that I had a place with their family, too.

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Whether you have an "open adoption" or a "closed adoption" in terms of contact, you can parent with an open heart

Parenting with an Open Heart

Whether you see your child’s birth parents frequently or have never had contact, you can still imbue your adoption and your relationship with your child with openness.

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Growing to Love Grace's Birth Mom

“A Birthday Gift for Grace”

It wasn't until my daughter's first birthday that it hit me: I was grieving her birth mom's loss. With that realization, I was able to celebrate as she would have wanted.

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Megan's Birthday Tree

[Book Review] Megan’s Birthday Tree

When Megan was born, her birth mother, Kendra, planted a tree in her backyard. Every year on Megan's birthday, Kendra decorates the tree and sends photos of it to Megan, in honor of their special bond.

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Mother and daughter talking about adoption

Questions About Being “Given Up”

Our seven-year-old daughter knows her adoption story, but, lately, she's been asking a lot of questions about why she was 'given up.'

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Setting boundaries in open adoption may be awkward, but it is necessary

Setting Boundaries in Open Adoption

In an open adoption, your child's birth parents become part of your extended family. Here are some common questions when it comes to managing those relationships.

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How to keep up contact with birth parents.

Keeping Up Contact with Birth Parents

An open adoption arrangement may be buffeted by passing time and changing circumstances. Here's how to make your relationship endure.

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Her daughter's birth family joined her in the hospital

“Welcomed By Our Daughter’s Birth Family”

I asked my family not to come to the hospital when she was born, then mourned their absence. Enter her birth relatives.

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chinese birth parent search and reunions

Letting Her Go: Chinese Birth Parent Search and Reunions

The first study on this topic provides fascinating insights about adoptees’ and parents’ motivations to search, search methods used, the initial reunion, and ongoing contact.

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An image of a holiday letter to birth family

What to Share in the Holiday Letter to Birth Family

It's normal to think about your child's birth family during the holidays. What should you share in a holiday letter?

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