"We are preparing for our first overnight visit with sisters we hope to adopt from foster care, and are nervous. What are we supposed to do for 24 hours with two children who are essentially strangers?"
Ask AF: How to Discourage Indiscriminate Affection
A mother who adopted from foster care seeks advice about discouraging her children from charming or hugging strangers— and how to respond to the adults who think the child is just 'being sweet.'
Parents Share: The “Match Meeting” with an Expectant Mother
"Be yourself" and more real-life advice for the "match meeting" with an expectant mother.
8 Keys to Talking About Adoption
There is no one-size-fits-all script to walk parents through conversations with their children about they way they joined their family, but there are guidelines you can follow to ensure years of open, honest communication.
Parents Share: How Is Parenting After Adoption Different?
We asked parents to "name one way in which adoptive parenting differs from parenting a biological child." From maintaining an open adoption to understanding trauma parenting to feeling free to agree wholeheartedly with compliments about your child's looks, here's what readers shared.
“Almost Famous”
The day we became a transracial adoptive family was the day we lost our anonymity in our community. We’ve learned to handle the extra attention with some advance prep before going public, some choice words, and some perspective.
“She’s Leaving Home”
As parents, our goal is to raise independent, self-sufficient human beings. But, truth be told, it hurts like a %$#* when you realize you’ve done your job.
Ask AF: Should I Try to Contact My Children’s Birth Siblings?
A mother who adopted from foster care seeks advice about contacting the adoptive parents of her children's birth siblings. Fellow adoptive parents weigh in.
Ask AF: Seven-Year-Old Has Been Saying She Doesn’t “Belong Here”
Parents are puzzled by their seven-year-old's new questions and feelings about adoption. Adoption expert Beth Friedberg, LCSW, offers an explanation and talking tips.
Media Focus: Lissa Schneckenburger
Lissa Schneckenburger’s new album, Thunder in My Arms, takes foster and adoptive parents on a melodic song cycle about the ongoing effects of early trauma and the healing power of community, understanding, and love. Tune in to learn more.
21 Noteworthy Adoption Books Published in 2018
Looking for a new book for yourself or your child? Look no further than Adoptive Families' annual roundup of new memoirs, novels, children’s books, and non-fiction with adoption storylines or themes, including a compelling crop of young adult fiction.
Ask AF: Advice for Our “Ice Breaker” Meeting with a 10-Year-Old Boy?
"We are adopting from foster care and have an 'ice breaker' meeting with a 10-year-old boy scheduled for tomorrow. I’m super nervous. Can anyone share advice about forging a connection?"
Parents Share: Our Last-Minute “Stork Drop” Adoption
We asked, did you get "the call" that you'd been selected by a birth mother after the baby was already born? Parents respond with their experiences and been-there advice.
Ask AF: Rivalry with a Newly Adopted Sibling
"Our son had been excited about the idea of a 'little brother,' but, from the day our younger son came home, they have had intense rivalry; there was no 'honeymoon' period. What can we do?"
“…and so It Goes”
My older son is off at college, and I’ve been heartened to see that his “new normal” includes a maturing and strengthening of the bond between us. I look back to the day I met him, just over eight years ago, and our years of attachment struggles, even as I look to his future, and ours, with hope.
“The Advice I Wish I’d Gotten While Waiting to Adopt”
Most prospective adoptive parents don’t get cards or baby showers, or even much excitement. It’s time to change that. Buying something for your hoped-for baby won’t ‘jinx’ your plan to adopt, and 11 more things I wish someone had told me during the wait.
“What Being a Foster Family Has Taught My Children”
Amazingly, the number one question we’re asked about being a foster family is: “Are you afraid of what they'll teach your children?” So, what have my kids learned? To start—to be open, generous, non-judgmental, thankful for their warm home….
“…and Letting It Be” – My Son’s Transition to College
When I adopted my two sons eight years ago, they couldn’t separate themselves fast enough from their “old” life in Brazil. As I prepared to visit my oldest son two months into his “new” college life—a lifetime for any freshman—I wondered to what extent he might have compartmentalized his now “old” family life.
Never Too Old for Family – Myths and Realities of Foster Adoption
Today in the United States, more than 123,000 children in foster care are waiting for a permanent home through adoption. Nearly 45 percent of these children are ages eight or older—and desperately need the stability, guidance, and love that only a family can provide. Learn more of the myths and realities surrounding older child adoption.
Ask AF: Reconciling Different Personalities in Adoption
A mother finds herself exhausted trying to keep up with the boisterous, outgoing older child she's adopting, and also worries that the girl might start feeling "different" from the rest of the family (who are all naturally more reserved and quiet). An expert offers advice.