Bonding and Attachment After Adoption - Advice & Personal Stories


Stories and advice from parents and adoption experts about bonding and attachment with a newly adopted child.

Read our older child adoption tips

When Your Older Child Comes Home

When Your Older Child Comes Home

We're about to adopt a seven-year-old. Does he have to start school right away? What about medical care? What can wait until we've bonded?

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An essay on becoming adoptive parents

“Mother’s Day Chocolate”

In one life-changing day, I became a mom. But I took time to savor the sweetness of a dream coming true.

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Older children will need an adjustment period after adoption

Overcoming Older Child Anxiety

We recently adopted a five-year-old. She seems so fearful and anxious! How can we help her learn to trust and love us?

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Adoptive breastfeeding worked for this family

“Nursing Matthew”

Breastfeeding my baby has been one of the most challenging — and rewarding — things I've ever done.

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I fit easily into motherhood, in the end.

“Missing My Mom as I Became a Mother”

After I lost my mother, parenting seemed too difficult to face. But her faith in me gave me the strength to push through.

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Relatives may have trouble accepting your adoption.

“When Relatives Never Get Adoption”

Two AF readers open up about the painful and rarely talked-about experience of dealing with a relative who never gets on board.

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An adoptive and biological family after their finalization

“Finally — Finalization!” — Part 6 of Foster Adoption Series

In part six of our adoption odyssey, Angie and Alexandra become our children in the eyes of the law. In our hearts, that had happened months ago.

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What You Need to Know About Formula

Formula — What You Need to Know

With all the conflicting information on formula, it's no wonder parents can get confused. Our adoption medicine expert is here to help.

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Group of siblings, several in their teen years, and father

“Balancing Act” — Part 5 of Foster Adoption Series

In part five of our family's adoption odyssey, we begin the tug-of-war also known as parenting a teenager.

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Two sisters who joined their forever family via Fost/Adopt

“Learning How to Settle In” — Part 3 of Foster Adoption Series

In the third part of our family's adoption odyssey, our new daughters help us rediscover the joy in everyday moments.

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A smiling baby, progressing through the stages of infant development

When You Adopt a Baby: An Overview of Developmental Stages

A look at what to expect at different developmental stages of babyhood—and what each stage means for adoptive parents.

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A new family, including birth siblings, biological and foster children

“A New Family Dynamic” — Part 2 of Foster Adoption Series

In the second part of our family's adoption odyssey, we meet our new daughters and confront their past — and look to our future together.

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Sleep problems in adopted children can be overcome

All Through the Night

Parents and experts weigh in on the best ways to get our kids to sleep.

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My life changed forever when I decided to adopt a Chinese baby

“Helpless Love”

There is an irrevocable moment when you become a parent, an instant when the idea of your child enters your heart forever.

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Adoption expert Lois Melina on talking with adopted children about unknown birth family information

When the Circle of Family Grows

Parents always celebrate when a new child joins their family. But adoptive moms and dads might want to mark their blessed event with a meaningful ceremony beyond the usual festivities.

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Disruption may be the only option

Letting Go: The Truth About Adoption Disruption

The decision to disrupt an adoption is agonizing. But if it's been made, we must focus on the child's best interests rather than on placing blame, say families and experts.

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Seth outgrew his head banging

“The Baby Who Never Cried”

Our newly adopted baby didn't like to cuddle, and, when needed us, he either banged his head on the floor or screamed at the top of his lungs.

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