My son is African American. When we're out, people frequently approach us, and want to touch his hair. Most seem to be well-meaning, but is this ever OK? What can I say?
“The Promise of a Thousand Memories”
"Your baby is coming!" Our daughter's birth mom, Brooke, had finally gone into labor, almost two weeks late. The call came at 3:30 A.M., and we were out the door by 4 A.M. The toy dangling from the empty car seat rattled like a ticking clock as we drove along the highway for two long hours.
“Our Initiation Into Parenthood”
Our first foster placements were a two-year-old girl and her baby brother. Their last placement had disrupted due to her primal fits. As a child therapist, I dealt with children all day, sometimes for an hour at a time. I told my husband we could handle it. I’ll get back to that later.
Ask AF: Telling Our Child We’re Adopting
Answers to your parenting questions.
Proposed Law Would Make Adoption Tax Credit Refundable
A bipartisan bill seeks to make the adoption tax credit refundable, helping lower-income families.
Hiring Your Adoption Professional
Doing your homework helps you feel comfortable with your selection. How can you find that same comfort level when you hire an adoption professional? You probably have not done that before, and you may not know anyone else who has, either. You may not know what to ask for or how to get what you need.
[Book Review] In My Heart
Molly Bang's warm, reassuring children's book provides a tender reminder of the bond between parent and child, even when they are apart all day long. In My Heart doesn't mention adoption, but the illustrations led my son to say, "Look, Mom! He's adopted, like me!"
[Book Review] Telling The Truth To Your Adopted Or Foster Child: Making Sense Of The Past
Betsy Keefer Smalley and Jayne E. Schooler's book will help parents who are struggling to find the right words to tell an adoption story in a positive and realistic way.
“My First Mother’s Day”
My first Mother's Day took me from Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, to Chicago. It was the day I was baptized into motherhood.
“When I Knew I Was Ready to Adopt”
Even after we turned in our paperwork, I wasn't 100-percent certain I was ready to adopt. But when the time was right, I knew.
“To Those Still Waiting”
Our "adoption journey" was not an easy one. No, our road was bumpy and dark and full of unmarked turns that were gently referred to by our social workers as failed matches or changes of heart. With every disappointment we endured, I struggled with what I call the both/and—holding two conflicting feelings at once.
Ask AF: Upset About Mom’s Pregnancy
Q: We adopted our daughter from foster care at age 11. Two months ago, I found out I was pregnant. At first she was very excited, but now she huffs or changes the subject whenever it comes up. I’m sure she’s upset that she’ll have to share her room and her parents, but how can I prove that our love for her will remain the same?
Foster Youth Becomes Miss Alabama’s Outstanding Teen
A foster youth living in a group home defied the odds to become Miss Alabama's Outstanding Teen.
Ask AF: When a Teen Wants to Know Both Birth Parents
Q: My 14-year-old knows her birth mother, but her birth father never wanted to be a part of her life, and is currently incarcerated. She wrote him a letter several months ago and didn’t get a response, and has been struggling with this. Her older brother has good relationships with both of his birth parents, which I believe makes it harder for her.
“The Baby Sister Effect”
An amazing transformation occurred in our family when we brought our newly adopted baby girl home to our two biological sons, then seven and nine. Like other boys their ages, my sons thought mostly about sports, food, Star Wars, playing with their friends, and, occasionally, about school.
“A Test of Character”
In June of 2004, while flying with my family to China, I wondered what our new family would be like. Would our two boys, our biological sons, treat their new sister differently? Our oldest, Dakota, was four at the time of our trip, and Cole was almost three.
“A Love We Never Expected”
When we first considered adoption, my husband and I discussed how much contact we were willing to have with the birth mother. We didn't realize how close we'd become to the whole birth family.
“I Have Four Moms”
For many parents who adopted children internationally, a birth mother relationship is uncharted territory.
“Our Happiest Meal”
Last September, after a Saturday morning of shopping with my mother, we stopped for a frozen yogurt. Around 12:15 P.M. I got a call from Kelly Jacobson, a contact at our agency. I presumed it was something volunteer related, as I had been helping out at the agency, so I calmly answered the phone.
“Taking Moms for Granted”
We try to teach our daughter Mariah gratitude. But I know we're doing something right when she takes us for granted.