My Boys, "the Immigrants""When my sons were babies, white people on the street couldn’t stop cooing over them. But as they move into childhood, we rarely get approached."
By Skila Brown
 As the mother of three Guatemalan boys, all under the age of seven, I am accustomed to challenges. Manipulating Transformers, finding missing shin guards, and keeping enough snacks in the house are tough. But by far, the most difficult aspect of raising my Latino children is how to do so within the current climate of immigration debates. With the presidential election upon us, it seems everywhere we turn people are talking about immigration. And they are talking with fervor, no matter which way they lean.
Sadly, I have found that people are using this national conversation about immigration as a forum to air their prejudices against Latino people. As an example, I recently had a conversation with a friend of a friend about the Spanish-language immersion school in our district. After telling her that we were considering it, she balked and gave me an earful about how that was unacceptable, saying, "I’m not against children learning another language. I’ve been trying to teach my daughter some French. But I have to draw the line somewhere. These immigrants are taking our jobs and ruining this town!"
So...she was opposed to the Spanish part of the school, and used that as an opportunity to launch into a political rant. Unfortunately, this kind of interaction is becoming commonplace. I hear people calling all Latinos "immigrants." Although they are usually trying to make a point about undocumented workers, the tone of their conversation drifts from issues about taxes and welfare to blatant prejudices: "Nobody speaks any English!" or "They’ve taken over the neighborhood!" And I hear this talk in front of my own Latino children.
When I read stories about the crazy ranch owner in Texas who started holding Latino people at gunpoint until authorities could come and check their papers, I wonder what life will be like for my sons when they become Latino men. Will they constantly be asked to verify their legal status? Will they continually be criticized for "taking the jobs" of their peers?
When my sons were babies, white people on the street couldn’t stop cooing over how cute they were. Strangers approached me daily with compliments for my children. Usually, people would begin with an excited, "Was he adopted?" As my sons move into childhood, I rarely get approached. Instead, I feel looks of disgust bare into my sides if my children and I speak Spanish in public. And when people ask about one of my children, they usually say, "Is his father Mexican or something?" They don’t seem particularly happy about that thought.
Because of the immigration debate, our society seems to have some large issues with Latinos today. And it will certainly be something that our Latino children will face head-on as they grow into young adulthood.
Skila Brown lives with her family in Lexington, Kentucky.
What to Do
In today’s political climate, your child’s citizenship may be questioned. Here are three tips from C.J. Lyford, an immigration attorney:
Explain to your child that he is a full U.S. citizen, even if he was born in a foreign country. (He became a U.S. citizen upon adoption.)
Make a copy of the first pages of his U.S. passport and/or his Certificate of Citizenship. These documents include your child’s photograph, and offer official proof of citizenship. They can be carried in his backpack or wallet.
If you’re traveling across state or international borders, bring a copy of your child’s state birth certificate. (You can reduce and laminate it to make it easier to carry.) This certificate has both your names and your child’s, and officially identifies you as his parents.
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Voices
When I became old enough to go out without my parents, I noticed that people looked at me differently. The first time this struck me, I was shopping with a childhood friend, a girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. We walked into store after store, and, each time, I was watched closely, as though I were going to shoplift. No one looked at my friend; she could have stolen anything, because the salespeople were so focused on me! Finally, at the sixth store, I blurted out, ‘You know, I hate when people just assume that, because I have brown skin, I’m a criminal.’ The cashier and the customers waiting in line all put their heads down, and refused to look my way. They were afraid that I might confront them for being racist, and for thinking that, just because someone is tan, she is a thief."
—GABRIELA, AGE 17
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Comments
When I see my niece's two beautiful son's I always rejoice in the fact that they were rescued from the abject poverty they were born into. They are surrounded with love and have the things that we take for granted every day - food- clothing - a warm bed to sleep in. Never did I think of them as an "illegal". So this was a wake call for me. What is it going to take for us "PRIVILEGED WHITE" people to stop judging some one by the color of their skin. I have a wonderful grandson who fills my life with joy and my grand nephews deserve all the advantages he has.
Posted by: Aunt Judy at 12:07pm Mar 8
This article has touched my heart heavily. I have four beautiful grandsons. They fill my life with the ultimate of joys whenever we are together. I dwell upon their word. I am a much better listener today than in earler years with my own children. I only pray God will give me some more years to watch them grow into the responsible citizens I know they will become. Oh, by the way, 3 are adopted which is something I never seem to think of since the day they arrived in our families. My fourth grandchild sees his cousins as his cousins, nothing less or different in any way than he is. I applaud all people who open their hearts and homes to children who need them. Children are children all over this world and growing up should not dictate they are any different than when they are little ones. kk/grammy
Posted by: kathy at 7:15am Mar 9
My son is now 11 years old. He is half Dominican and half Puerto Rican. We adopted him when he was 4 years old from foster care and he is wonderful. We did move to a more diverse town near Boston but I still have concerns as he gets older. He had a crush on a girl and her father told her that "brown boys" shouldn't marry white girls. I am also concerned about all the talk about Latinos and illegal immigration and how this will affect him. He now has a very strong, positive self-image. Patty
Posted by: Patty at 6:56pm Mar 9
Actually, it is not just PRIVILEGED WHITE people who have serious political convictions about latino immigrants in America. Those feelings are shared by Americans of every shade and socioeconomic level.
Posted by: Stephanie at 2:29pm Sep 9
THANK YOU, Skila, for writing this article. As the mother to two beautiful Guatemalan boys, I often have these exact same thoughts and experiences. Reading your words reminded me that I am not alone. Here in Maryland, there recently was a proposed bill to require public schools to count and track the number of "possible illegal immigrants" in the school system. To know that my innocent children could be victims of such unnecessary and judgemental practices is heartbreaking. Luckily the bill was not approved, but it certainly was yet another eye opening experience of the challenges that our children will face in this politically charged environment.
Posted by: Jen at 5:33pm Mar 31
If I had a dollar for every time that someone has questioned my legal status or assumed that I'm a thief because I'm Latin American... Racism is pervasive in our society, and I see more of it the older I get. I've gotten in the habit of carrying my passport, and the more racism I get, the more grateful I am that I speak no Spanish. We shouldn't have to live like this. It's isn't right to have to be ashamed of or constantly defending your heritage.
Posted by: R at 12:37am Apr 1
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