I planned our homeland trip, hoping to see my children’s birthplaces. Surprisingly, those proved elusive, but we found meaning at every turn.
“Intimate Strangers”: Birth Parent Contact in Foster Adoption
The 894 pages of my daughter’s foster care case history described her birth mother’s hard life, scarred by poverty, drug addiction, and homelessness. I never expected to meet her—much less like her.
“Growing Up Feeling ‘Chosen'”
Children’s understandings of and personal fantasies about their adoption stories may differ from what you tell them. My version saw my parents wandering the aisles of “Baby Market.”
“Babies and Birth Moms and Bellies, Oh My!”
When our two children began to ask questions — lots of questions — my partner and I found answers in homemade adoption storybooks.
“Moving Past My Infertility”
My infertility was in the past. But was I ready to laugh at immature teenage jokes about adoption?
“Nursing Matthew”
Breastfeeding my baby has been one of the most challenging — and rewarding — things I’ve ever done.
Birth Parent Search in International Adoption
Adoptive parents around the globe are seeking their children’s first families — even before these children voice an opinion on the matter. But do we know what we’re doing?
“How Our Family Approached Our Birth Parent Search”
Three families describe their relationships with their children’s birth parents — deciding to keep in touch, searching for birth parents, and managing an already open adoption.
“Missing My Mom as I Became a Mother”
After I lost my mother, parenting seemed too difficult to face. But her faith in me gave me the strength to push through.
“I Can’t Give My Daughter China. I Can Only Give Her Chinatown.”
Jin Yu is seven now, and lately she’s been telling me she wants to go and visit her nannies, the women who cared for her at the orphanage in China. Not so much for herself, she says, but for them. Because she is sure they must miss her and wonder how she’s doing. I promise we will try to go. “They are going to be so surprised!” she tells me.
“Braiding Barbara’s Hair”
As the white mother of an African American daughter, I learned more than I ever could’ve imagined about hair.
“Honoring My Ethiopian Daughters’ Heritage”
My daughters have caramel brown skin, dark brown eyes, and tightly curled black hair. They are African by birth, American by citizenship, but have always self-identified as Habesha (the Amharic word for Ethiopian).
“When Relatives Never Get Adoption”
Two AF readers open up about the painful and rarely talked-about experience of dealing with a relative who never gets on board.
“Finally — Finalization!” — Part 6 of Foster Adoption Series
In part six of our adoption odyssey, Angie and Alexandra become our children in the eyes of the law. In our hearts, that had happened months ago.
“Balancing Act” — Part 5 of Foster Adoption Series
In part five of our family’s adoption odyssey, we begin the tug-of-war also known as parenting a teenager.
“Learning How to Settle In” — Part 3 of Foster Adoption Series
In the third part of our family’s adoption odyssey, our new daughters help us rediscover the joy in everyday moments.
“A New Family Dynamic” — Part 2 of Foster Adoption Series
In the second part of our family’s adoption odyssey, we meet our new daughters and confront their past — and look to our future together.
“In the Beginning” — Part 1 of Foster Adoption Series
In part one of our family’s adoption odyssey, we make our way through our state’s Fost/Adopt program and find that things don’t always go according to plan. But sometimes, that’s for the best.
[Book Review] Born in Our Hearts
Together, two anthologies offer a complex, realistic account of adoption.
“Would I Be Allowed to Adopt After the Diagnosis?”
I was terrified that telling our social worker I’d been diagnosed with bipolar disorder would end our dream of having a child.