A Durable Relationship

Our adoption expert details the ups and downs of open adoption, and how to keep the relationship going — even when it's hard.

Selma and Bob adopted through an agency that facilitated open adoptions. When they met the birth mother who had selected them to adopt her child, they agreed to send photos and letters every month and to get together with her once a year. It seemed like a reasonable request. Five years later, Selma and Bob moved to another city and adopted another child. With two preschoolers at home, Selma found months going by before a roll of film was used ...

Over the years, an open adoption arrangement may need to evolve to accommodate the changing needs of everyone involved — above all, the child.

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